It's a bit of an odd feeling to be "home" when so far away from it -- but day by day, New Zealand is becoming home for us.
We're settling into a routine. We're making friends and finding favorite grocery stores. We're talking less about Virginia and more about the places we want to visit here. And it feels good.
But there will probably always be some distance between us and our new community -- and becoming aware of that gap has made me much more empathetic to the immigrant experience overall.
Turns out, it's not always easy being a "foreigner" in a strange land, especially when that land becomes...well, familiar. But since our family has had probably one of the easiest and most pleasant transitions one could experience when moving abroad, I thought I'd share some thoughts on what it's like to be an American in New Zealand.
We pretty much fit right in.
We speak the predominant language, English. We look like a lot of the people born and bred here. We share much of the same cultural identity and recognize each other's pop culture cues. Before we open our mouths, people probably don't even know we're not from around these parts. And that makes it so much easier for us to feel welcomed and at ease.
More so, Auckland is a very international culture, with people from all over the world represented. Many folks we've become friends with are actually foreigners too, from India and South Africa, Tanzania and Australia. Much like our home in Northern Virginia, the population here is incredibly diverse. Americans make up just a small portion of the mix. Still, being one among many nationalities is far easier than being the outsider among one.
My twang can be a problem.
Overall we have little problem communicating with the people here. The slang is easy to decipher, the accents not hard to understand -- and that seems to go both ways. Shane does better than me on the communication front, as I have a little more hillbilly twang in some of my words. The workers at this one store in particular (*cough cough Spotlight*) act like they can't understand a thing I say -- which I have a hard a time believing. I get the sense they aren't too keen on hillbillies ;)
Is immigration good or bad?
It may reassure you a bit to know that pretty much every country in the world is having a come apart over immigration right now. America, of course, is making headlines for deporting people, blocking whole countries of immigrants, debating the infamous wall and figuring out what to do with those dangerous Dreamers. Europe and the UK are dealing with their own crises over the matter. And New Zealand is far from immune to the global backlash against globalization.
There is a minority political party here, New Zealand First, that mimics some of the rhetoric we hear from Trump and the like, especially around jobs and immigrants. I have to say, it's hard to listen to their viewpoints from the perspective of an immigrant. It makes me feel sad, threatened and unwanted. But luckily for me, it's not the majority viewpoint here. (In fact, I think only the workers at Spotlight prescribe to it ;) I can't even imagine what it's like for immigrants in America to listen to those kind of comments from people in power and in their communities. I think it would be incredibly upsetting.
And since I'm already in two-cents territory, here's the rest of my spiel on this: We live in a global society. Period. That's not going to change. In fact, as this next generation comes of age to work and travel and build their lives, countries will probably become a quaint little thing of the past. My kids know no borders; they know no nationality. Since they were babies, they've been surrounded by people from all over the world -- and that's completely normal to them.What's not normal is the Me First attitude that, I hope, runs its course before too long.
People have heard about Mr. Trump.
When people hear me talk for the first time and realize I'm not from around these parts, they rarely ask me where I'm from or what brought me here. If they do ask, they like to start by guessing I'm Canadian. I think this is because Canadians don't like being mistaken for Americans, but Americans could care less. So best to err on the polite side, they feel.
When they do confirm I'm American AND that I'm from the Washington, D.C. area, they will sometimes dance around the topic of politics. I get the sense they're trying to figure out how I feel about Mr. Trump and the current state of things without saying something that will offend. This is very generous of them. I usually keep the conversation high level and stay away from politics altogether, mostly because I can't stomach it. And the adults I meet are happy to oblige.
Kids, on the other hand...
Kids here like to talk about Mr. Trump. "Is he your president? Is he a bad guy? My mommy doesn't like him! He doesn't like GIRLS!" They don't have an inkling about American politics, the failure of the two-party system, the Russian oligarch's Cold War overtime and Hillary's emails -- but they definitely know about Mr. Trump. I tend to say things like, "Oh, he's our President. That means he's kind of like the boss of our country." And, "Oh your mom doesn't like him? Not everybody does." I really don't know what to say, but they certainly do. They tell me all kinds of things they "know" about Mr. Trump ;)
Home is wherever I'm with you.
More than ever, we're realizing that home is where the four of us (and Moses) are. Virginia, America, New Zealand, the moon -- it doesn't matter where we live, what the locals are like or how mean the clerks at Spotlight are, we are home when we are together. Since moving, we've had the opportunity to spend more time together doing the things we love, and that makes all the rest worth it.
We're lucky and grateful to have landed in a country that's been welcoming and accepting of us. Feels like home indeed.
